Marriage misconceptions
Incorrect. Every Jewish resident of Israel must divorce through the State Rabbinate in accordance with Halakha, even if the couple married in a civil ceremony abroad.
Incorrect! Unlike the term "bastard" in English, a mamzer is not any child born out of wedlock. A mamzer (plural: mamzerim) is a Halakhic status applied to children conceived through a specific list of biblically forbidden sexual relations. The most common instances of mamzerim are children born from the extramarital affair of a halakhically married woman and a man who is not her husband. A mamzer and his offspring can only marry other mamzerim, and the status is inherited by all future generations. A child born to a couple married in a civil ceremony is not considered a mamzer and is not restricted as to whom he or she can marry.
Incorrect. Every Jewish couple registered as married by the Ministry of Interior can only get divorced through the State Rabbinate, regardless of type of ceremony. If they do not divorce through the Rabbinate, any subsequent children of the woman with a new partner will be considered mamzerim.
Correct! In a common law union, the couple is not legally married but is eligible for tax benefits similar to those enjoyed by married couples. When it comes to other matters, however, such as the breakdown of the relationship, a common law couple does not have the same status as a married couple and as such, is not subject to the Rabbinate’s jurisdiction. Children who are born to parents in a common law union are not considered mamzerim (as long as the woman is not concurrently halakhically married to another man), and are able to marry whomever they please.
If the ceremony did not include any religious components, then this is true. However, if the ceremony included any religious elements that would render the couple halakhically married, then this is incorrect. Because the Rabbinate has exclusive jurisdiction when it comes to divorce in Israel, if one of the partners "tattles" to the Rabbinate that the couple was married, the Rabbinate can blacklist the couple as "ineligible for marriage" until they go through the requisite divorce process at the Rabbinic Court.
Correct. This is the only situation in which the Family Court has jurisdiction to divorce a couple instead of Rabbinic Court. That said, if the mother is not Jewish and the children did not convert, they will not be considered Jewish and will not be able to marry Jews in Israel.
While it may not solve all the problems, we believe that if enough couples protest by marrying outside the Rabbinate, the Rabbinate will be forced to adapt to Israeli public opinion and will be unable to continue conducting itself as it does today.
Moreover, if more couples marry without involving the Rabbinate, the legitimacy for civil marriage in Israel will grow. Civil marriage will remove the need to divorce through State Rabbinic Courts and will engender greater equality between men and women.
Another advantage of choosing a private marriage ceremony is greater freedom of choice:
a. Individuals can marry whomever they choose and are free to ascribe to halakhic restrictions at their own discretion, instead of by state coercion.
b. Couples can design their own ceremonies according to their personal needs and conscience. This means being able to choose who presides over the ceremony, even if they are not on the official list of Rabbinate rabbis. Couples can also choose to have women participate in the ceremony.
What are my wedding options?
a. Halakhic Wedding
(i) Halakhic ceremony through the State Rabbinate
(ii) Halakhic ceremony by an Orthodox Rabbi in Israel or abroad
We strongly recommend that anyone who chooses one of the above two options signs our Contract for a Just and Fair Marriage.
b. Non-Halakhic Wedding
(i) Civil marriage abroad
(ii) Secular wedding in Israel – for further options, see http://havaya.info/
c. Living together without being married
(i) Common law union
We strongly recommend that anyone who chooses options b or c sign a Declaration of Partnership(currently available in Hebrew)
|
Type of marriage |
Will we be registered at Interior Ministry as “married”? |
Will our children be mamzers? |
Process for getting divorced |
How do I protect myself? |
|
Ceremony through the State Rabbinate |
Yes |
Not mamzerim |
Must obtain a "get" through the State Rabbinate. Without a get, any children of the women with a new partner will be mamzerim. |
We strongly recommend signing CWJ's Contract for a Just and Fair Marriage |
|
Ceremony with an Orthodox Rabbi but not through the State Rabbinate |
No |
Not mamzerim |
Halakhically, must obtain a “get”. If the Rabbinate finds out, they will require a get through the State Rabbinate. Without a get, any children of the women with a new partner will be mamzerim. |
We strongly recommend signing CWJ's Contract for a Just and Fair Marriage |
|
Halakhic but non-Orthodox ceremony (for example, Conservative ceremony) |
No |
Not mamzerim |
Halakhically, need for a “get” depends on the religious elements of the ceremony. If the Rabbinate finds out, they may or may not require a get through the State Rabbinate. |
We strongly recommend signing CWJ's Contract for a Just and Fair Marriage |
|
Non-Halakhic ceremony |
No |
Not mamzerim (provided the mother is not concurrently Halakhically married to someone else) |
The couple is not considered legally married in Israel. |
We strongly recommend signing CWJ's Declaration of Partnership |
|
Civil wedding abroad |
Yes |
Not mamzerim (provided the mother is not concurrently Halakhically married to someone else) |
The couple must get divorced through the State Rabbinate. The Rabbinate may or may not rule that a get is needed. Even without a “get”, children of the woman with a new partner will not be mamzerim |
We strongly recommend signing CWJ's Declaration of Partnership |
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